{"id":210,"date":"2005-10-06T16:29:05","date_gmt":"2005-10-06T21:29:05","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.angryredplanet.org\/log\/2005\/10\/06\/secret-christians-in-west-philadelphia\/"},"modified":"2007-11-06T12:04:46","modified_gmt":"2007-11-06T17:04:46","slug":"secret-christians-in-west-philadelphia","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.angryredplanet.org\/log\/2005\/10\/06\/secret-christians-in-west-philadelphia\/","title":{"rendered":"secret christians in west philadelphia"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>~ <\/p>\n<blockquote><p>did they appear out of thin air? perhaps you had just ordered a coffee, and instead were presented with a cadre of bible thumpers in bad suits? were they beamed down from a spacecraft?<\/p>\n<p>this is all very disturbing. <\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>no! there is an unnerving trend in west philadelphia which involves the use nubile, sensually dressed young ladies who are dispatched to your neighboring table in the <a href=\"http:\/\/www.cafetableaux.com\/green-line-cafe\">cafe<\/a> and your front door at home. they pose as normal students, only upon close inspection does one realize that they are, in fact, actual christians; the text they are studying is the &#8216;holy bible&#8217; and the syllabus before them is actually a list of &#8216;watchtower&#8217; drop off points. you speak to these cafe spies at the risk of a lecture with the intent to convert.<\/p>\n<p>on one occasion, however, we were able to observe a clearly collared priest proselytizing on the sidewalk; he was informing a boy in a foam hat and testament t-shirt of the harm in drinking beer from a coffee cup at 9am.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>~ did they appear out of thin air? perhaps you had just ordered a coffee, and instead were presented with a cadre of bible thumpers in bad suits? were they beamed down from a spacecraft? this is all very disturbing. no! there is an unnerving trend in west philadelphia which involves the use nubile, sensually [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[45,19],"class_list":["post-210","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-general","tag-cafe-tableaux","tag-philadelphia"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.angryredplanet.org\/log\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/210","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.angryredplanet.org\/log\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.angryredplanet.org\/log\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.angryredplanet.org\/log\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.angryredplanet.org\/log\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=210"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.angryredplanet.org\/log\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/210\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.angryredplanet.org\/log\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=210"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.angryredplanet.org\/log\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=210"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.angryredplanet.org\/log\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=210"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}